Ever since 500 Days of Summer gave us that Expectations vs Reality split-screen, it’s been the way a lot of us understand disappointment. The larger the difference, the greater the disappointment. It’s not a bad working definition.
This also makes a good case against overplanning your life.
When you live your life by one checklist after another, you might be extremely productive, but when things get in the way of your tasks, it creates a rift between what you expected and reality.
When those interruptions take the form of your kid wanting to play, a conversation with a stranger taking a man interesting turn, or birdsong calling you outside, a part of you knows deep down that these are worthy interruptions. They’re the ones that years from now, you’ll be glad you said yes to.
But, when you live by the rhythm of getting it all done, you learn a different muscle memory. It kicks in, processing these invitations as threats to the day you were expecting. In order to avoid disappointment, self preservation kicks in. The kids, the stranger, the birds, they all get sorted as distractions.
All that to say, checklists can be helpful until they aren’t. Don’t go so overboard on planning, you talk yourself out of saying yes to some of the best parts of life.