Over the past few months, I’ve gotten a lot of joy from seeing and being around people I know. I can remember virtually every interaction. I get a warmth from people’s presence.
There are a lot of reasonable explanations. The social isolation from a pandemic. The social isolation from having a pair of two-month-olds. But one I especially appreciate is one I barely understand.
There’s a lot of science behind the idea that people “rub off on you”
Really fascinating stuff happens when you know somebody. When you spend time with them. How their voice, their features, their mannerisms and habits imprint on your brain to the point where it’s almost like a copy of them is stored there. That’s why in someone’s absence you can conjure up things in their voice, you can know what that person would’ve said.
The idea that people can live on through our kindness, through our embodiment of their best traits… it’s more than just sentiment.
I know a lot of us are feeling somebody’s absence in our lives. I’ve been thinking of a friend I lost this week, but also of how much simple joy she found in being around others. Something I’ve felt a lot more myself in the past few months.
It reminds me of something Thich Naht Hahn said, in anticipation of his death.
“Tomorrow, I will continue to be. But you will have to be very attentive to see me. I will be a flower, or a leaf. I will be in these forms and I will say hello to you. If you are attentive enough, you will recognize me, and you may greet me. I will be very happy.”
Thich Naht Hanh